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Latest Tales From Exit 22

Opinion

Al Batt: It’s better to have a landline than a land mine these days

I swallowed a mosquito. I’m an adventurous eater.

Opinion

Al Batt: Last winter had been peaked, puny and downsized

The air carried the scent of a dirty athletic sock that had been microwaved.

Opinion

Al Batt: Let the good times roll—Toilet Paper Day is Aug. 26

It’s an August sublime. I’m still eating sweet corn, and the Minnesota Twins are still in the running. ...

Opinion

Al Batt: It was the first time a hush fell over that crowd

A cat owns my wife and me. We have three litter boxes because cats are territorial about those ...

Opinion

Al Batt: The best used by date is today; don’t take anyone for granted

I hadn’t heard from him since he went off to college at the South Dakota School of Mimes.

Opinion

Al Batt: A driver wearing only one mitten might be lost

Technically, nothing is lost until I stop looking for it.

Opinion

Al Batt: Visit the upcoming county fair and pick up a few calories

The Inuit have 50 names for snow cones.

Opinion

Al Batt: The raspy whisper of hoarse radish called to me

I’m an apex predator hunting for radishes, vital ingredients in a radish sandwich.

Opinion

Al Batt: Hey, Rover and Tabby, spit out that grass over there

It was a catchy little tune.

Opinion

Al Batt: I love the smell of wet squirrels in the morning

I couldn’t see a sun in the sky. It had either overslept or clouds covered it.

Opinion

Al Batt: I’ve been to about half of everywhere, man

The water hit like thousands of tiny bricks being flung at me with incredible accuracy. I was being ...

News

Al Batt: What do you want, sleepyhead, worms or waffles today?

We yawn when we’re tired, bored, hungry or stressed. Theories say yawning wakes the brain, cools the brain ...

Opinion

Al Batt: Air conditioning was something we had in winter

Tales from Exit 22 by Al Batt The AC guy was out to make sure our air was ...

Opinion

Al Batt: Minn. man, Iowa man and Florida man walk into a column

Did you hear about the Iowa man who moved to Minnesota? Some of his siblings thought he was ...

Opinion

Al Batt: There are eight million stories in the naked city

Life is changed faster than underwear.

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